Which Celebrity Has Won The Award For The Best Breakup?
They take their poodles for $500 haircuts and bathe them in Fuji Water. They base all major career choices on what their Kabbalah Rabbi says and won’t allow coffee within 50 feet of their home due to the toxins. To many of us this existence is beyond the realms of imagination, completely incomprehensible. This is so distant from the average Joe whose life consists of birth, marriage, and eventually death. However once in a blue moon these two worlds collide and the Celeb’s life takes on some earthly qualities, the colossal gap between normo and celebrity diminishes and the celebrity turns into a human being. At this point I start to wonder exactly what amazing advice I can give a Britney, Paris or Reese as they could definitely be my bestie. Over a coffee we would sit there and I would tell them ‘I know how you feel’. When reading the gossip columns it may appear that splitsville is the only destination on every celebrity’s journey. But do not fear, it is not all doom and gloom, out of this bleak landscape there is a beacon of light, The Best Celebrity Breakup Award. This highly sought after accolade is presented to Dawn French and Lenny Henry. The comedic couple were married twenty years more than the average celeb before they decided to go their separate ways.
It seems that this hilarious comedic couple’s marriage has been over for years and they have now wandered over the to realms of separation in a very non-celebrity manner. Forget the twitter fights, or public rows splashed across magazines. Ok there may have been an affair with a blonde in a hotel and a little trip to rehab but that was 11 years ago. The simple fact is they fell out of love. Dawn obviously turned to her beloved chocolate orange, and Lenny spent quite a few nights at the Premier Inn.
Never fear this award will always be contested. Let’s not forget some other hot contenders, Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan, Peter Andre and Katie Price, Jermain Defoe and [insert wannabe WAG], to name a few. And the big question remains, what becomes of the broken hearted? Obviously the girls of the playboy mansion, Holly, Kendra and Bridget with old crony Hugh Hefner deserve a mention, for their longevity, if nothing else. The list of nominees for this award is endless.
So Dawn and Lenny win because their marriage lasted far longer than anyone else’s (celebrity and non-celebrity alike). They win because a silver marriage like this deserves the silver lining of a Best Celebrity Award to ease the blow. But far more importantly they win because they kept their divorce announcement simple and kind, any bitterness was kept out of the public, and they made sure the split was amicable. So we let Dawn and Lenny bridge the gap between celebs and non-celebs, as they continue to be seen in public supporting each other, and allowing us to say ‘let’s just be friends’.
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